May



May Kanker is the youngest of the three Kanker Sisters. She is in love with Ed, and much like his friends he is afraid of her and the other Kankers. She has blonde hair and buck teeth, and is often seen wearing a gray T-shirt and red shorts. When she sleeps at night, she wears a one-piece pair of pajamas that goes from the bottom of her feet to her neck. Unlike the other characters, her nose is shaped like a pig's nose. In the episode "Dawn of the Eds," it is hinted that her hair might be a wig. This however, was most likely a gag as in other episodes prove that May's hair is well attached to her head.

She also doesn't know the number to dial for 9-1-1 to call the cops in the episode "Run for your Ed". She is the most naïve Kanker and is the most prone to clumsy accidents and/or scrapes like Ed.

[edit] May the Mouth
Flaxen-haired May with her trademark teeth and characteristic snort and slurp comes across as the youngest of the Kanker Sisters, for while Lee and Marie aren't afraid of letting the world know what they're thinking or doing (or who they're pounding) May is very often found lurking in the background, watching and waiting so she remains a bit of an unknown quantity. However true to her heritage when the time comes for action it's usually explosive and that voice hits your eardrums with the effect of an aluminum grater on a chunk of Monterey Jack! Mind you, it's not just the soft targets that cop the volume, her sisters often get the sharp end of her acid tongue too, proving you don't have to make the rules to get your point across - or your own way!

Coupled with her rather slow yet acutely waspish attitude. May also has a strong sense of justice, especially when it's not being done to her. Like her other sisters, she's prepared to waive the rules if it’s the Kankers who are dishing out the trouble of course but if she feels threatened or thinks that somebody's doing her out of her fair share then she soon speaks out. At considerable volume!

[edit] May the Mollycoddled
As with all sisters, rivalry plays its part in May's day to day life - there are plenty of the usual squabbles over the simple things like who answers the door and who sits in which sagging part of the couch, and occasionally the more upmarket ones concerning who gets to fix the fish sticks when you've got Eds round for tea and are trying to impress.

It seems that May has maybe been spoiled by her sisters in the past - after all, that pout and the leather lungs put you in mind of Sarah, but if that's the case, then the days of indulgence most definitely seem to be over now and she's expected to pull her weight 24/7, after all who else could fix Lee's untouchable hairdo so admirably, pouring on the gunk just in time to stop her sister going crusty? Of course having to pull her weight means that May expects to get rewarded in kind but of course life's not that simple, sunbathing on her tummy and starting to scorch it sure is uncomfortable but no matter how nicely she asks - and then how loudly she whines, there's just no way on earth that Marie is going to flip her lazy sister over and as for Lee, well you'll notice May doesn't even ask!

On rare occasions though her elder sisters are still prepared to spoil her, especially if they're harboring a sizable chunk or two of guilt - witness if you will then, the capture of poor unsuspecting Ed in the episode "Ed Overboard" whereby the big lug is kidnapped by Lee and Marie and presented to May as a new plaything. It may be love but it sure ain't pretty, kids!

[edit] May and Make Believe
"I'm a movie star" gushes May, flaunting for the camera with a hand on her hip. Aw, don't be surprised for even these bad girls have dreams of one day becoming glamorous, popular and idolized by all. Of course all this is probably a few thousand light years out of reach right now but failing that there's always fantasy to fall back on and the Kankers seem to excel at that.

Of course as we all know, the girl's biggest fantasy of all is that the Eds are their boyfriends and if that means they have to partake in a gun-slinging western adventure, or turn into marauding pirates to keep up appearances then so much the better and after all, May is a dead eye shot with a bobby pin so it's too good an opportunity to miss!

[edit] May and her Man
May's reluctant boyfriend is Ed of course, although he'll need to change a few basic traits before he measures up to her surprisingly stringent standards, especially if the hollered 'Don't talk with your mouthful, mister!' is anything to go by!

But to be quite honest, they do seem the best matched pair of the six protagonists, after all they share more than a couple of common traits - like Ed, May has a lot of imagination that tends to run away with her faster than a meatball down a mountain - the wailing reaction to Eddy's camera flash, sorry - I mean the alien abduction - is a prime example of somebody who watches far too much dodgy prime-time TV and quite possibly the odd B-movie too! Add to that the fact that they both seem to suffer rampant foot odor and find nothing unusual in tumble drying their hot dogs and you have the proof of the pudding!

What's more Ed possesses a very special quality that May is sure to highly prize, namely he's not allowed to fight girls which surely makes him pretty desirable in the pliant, passive and putty-like boyfriend stakes. Added to this is the fact that Ed's reaction to being kissed by May is nowhere near the mixed state of catatonia and panic induced in Eddy and Edd by Lee and Marie. Nope, Ed seems to think it's funny and has even initiated the lovey-dovies on one occasion (albeit accidentally). Of course we all know Ed doesn't really know what's going on around him most of the time but if May ever gets a hold of him he'll be feeling reality pretty sharpish. An odd couple to be sure, but maybe the ones who stand the best chance for future romance!